Short answer: write like a person someone would actually meet, not a résumé. Be specific, warm, and screen for values.
The Seven‑part blueprint
One: Start with a one‑line promise of experience
Your first sentence sets the vibe. Think “what it’s like to date me,” not “who I am on paper.”
Example: “Saturdays = tennis, street markets, and debating which old‑school R&B is best, your pick for the tie‑breaker.”
Why it works: it shows rhythm (tennis → markets → music), invites a choice, and hints at playfulness.
Two: Show—don’t state—your traits
Skip adjectives like “fun, loyal, ambitious.” Show them.
Instead of: “I’m adventurous.”
Try: “Booked a solo flight to Lisbon because my favourite pastry chef moved there, priorities.”
Three: Write to one person
Your profile should read like a message to the right person, not a general ad.
Line to steal: “If your idea of a perfect evening is a tiny restaurant, a shared dessert, and a walk home debating plot twists, we will click.”
Four: Use the 50/30/20 rule
50%: You now (habits, hobbies, humour).
30%: Your rhythms (family, faith, community, fitness).
20%: Your near‑future (what you are building toward).
This keeps you real, not theoretical.
Example block: “Weekdays I’m in product marketing (remote). Evenings are for the gym or choir rehearsal. I mentor girls in STEM on Saturdays. Next year: a 10‑day food tour through the Caribbean with my mum.”
Five: Answer prompts with micro‑stories
Treat each prompt like a two to three sentence scene.
Prompt: “The way to my heart is…”
Response: “Laugh with the waiter. Tip well. Sing the wrong lyrics at red lights. I don’t need perfect—I need present.”
Prompt: “Unusual skills”
Response: “I can calm crying babies and lead a budget meeting. Both require snacks.”
Six: Signal values without a lecture
Name two to three non‑negotiables in a friendly way.
Examples:
“Faith matters to me. Sunday service + service in the community.”
“I’m close to my family (Caribbean roots). You will hear patois when the games get serious.”
“Therapy is normal here. I’m into growth and clean conflict.”
Seven: End with a clear call to action (CTA)
Invite a small, specific step.
CTA examples:
“Pitch me your most underrated London coffee shop and I’ll bring the cinnamon rolls.”
“If you’d beat me at Spades, prove it.”
Photo lineup: Six shots that screen and attract
Natural smile, good light, eyes visible.
Full‑body in everyday clothes.
Context shot: you doing something (lifting, choir, painting, hiking).
Social proof: one friend or family moment not a crowd.
Passion: you teaching/performing/building.
Seasonal or travel: scene + you not scenery only.
No sunglasses walls. No group pics as pic #1. No more than one mirror selfie.
Profile templates you can copy and paste
A) Busy professional (warm, decisive)
“Day job: healthcare ops. Night job: being the family’s unofficial party planner. Cardio is 90s R&B + cleaning. Fitness, faith, family dinners. I like people who keep small promises and big dreams. If ‘quality time’ and ‘gentle honesty’ are your love languages, we will cook. First move: tell me your comfort show, and we will trade favourite episodes.”
B) Dating after 35 (clear intentions)
“Happy, healed, and open to partnership. Co‑parenting one amazing 9‑year‑old great schedule. Sundays = church + meal prep + football with my brothers. I steward my peace, guard my time, and value consistent effort. I show up the way I want to be loved. Looking for a man who is emotionally available, kind under pressure, and serious about building.”
C) Christian Black matchmaking vibe value‑forward
“Faith first. Choir alto. I lead a small group for young adults and love a good Bible + brunch debate. I’m affectionate, silly, and big on service let’s pack food boxes and then find the city’s best jollof. If you pray before plans and laugh before conclusions, send your best bad hymn joke.”
Common mistakes (and quick fixes)
Laundry lists of dislikes. Fix: state your standard once: “Kindness and accountability live here.”
Job‑heavy bios. Fix: give one line on work, spend the rest on life.
Vague travel flexing. Fix: “T&T for Carnival with cousins, yes, we have matching tees.”
No CTA. Fix: Add a choice “Karaoke: Whitney or Mary J?”.
A 5‑minute edit checklist
Swap three adjectives for three scenes.
Add one line that shows your why: family, faith, mission.
Add a CTA.
Cut one cliché
Read it out loud. If it sounds like you, you are done.
Your profile is a filter, not a net. Make it easy for the right person to recognise you.