Growing up in a broken family can have lasting effects on individuals, even if they do not recognise the impact of their upbringing. Many men and women today carry emotional scars from childhood traumas experienced within their families.Afro-Caribbean individuals are no exception. In numerous African and Caribbean households, it was common for children to be raised by a single parent, often their mother or grandmother. Witnessing continuous parental conflict, physical abuse by fathers towards both mothers and children, or knowing about fathers with multiple children from different relationships were experiences shared by many young African and Caribbean children whether they resided in Jamaican or Kenyan.These experiences leave scars, some visible and others hidden. For some Afro-Caribbean men, the scars run deep. Some vow never to emulate their fathers and may adopt characteristics akin to their mothers – becoming timid, pliable, and vulnerable. Others mirror their fathers’ behaviour, becoming abusive and indulging in alcoholism. Similarly, some Afro-Caribbean women raised in similar circumstances vow to never submit to any man and may adopt assertive, domineering traits, losing their gentle, maternal nature. Others may seek partners resembling their fathers, perpetuating a cycle of abusive relationships.These scarred individuals are not emotionally prepared for healthy, mature adult relationships. They require healing and forgiveness towards their parents for past mistakes. Many need to hear sincere apologies from their parents, or if deceased, they need to forgive them to commence the healing process. Until they reconcile with their parents, they are not suitable candidates for life partners and may inadvertently perpetuate broken relationships.Signs of individuals harboring parental issues include:Strained relationships or animosity towards their parents. Anyone who harbours hatred or resentment towards their parents is unlikely to forgive your mistakes in a relationship.Using derogatory language when referring to their parents. If they resort to disrespectful language towards their parents, they may likely use similar language with you.Frequently discussing childhood abuse and neglect with lingering bitterness.Bitterness and unforgiveness breed anger and sorrow, hindering the ability to nurture love in relationships. Such unresolved emotions may surface during disagreements, leading to the repetition of destructive patterns.Recognising these warning signs in a potential partner is crucial. They indicate potential hazards in future relationships and signify that the individual may not be the right fit for a healthy, fulfilling partnership.