Meet Darius: a 35 year old British Nigerian professional who has spent the last year tirelessly swiping on dating apps. After dozens of fruitless chats and awkward first dates, Darius feels burned out. One rainy London evening, he matches with someone promising only to discover they had misrepresented themselves. Frustrated, Darius decides to try a different approach: hiring a matchmaker. This is the turning point of his dating journey, leading him from endless swipes to a curated path toward a soulmate.
When Apps Lose Their Appeal
In the beginning, dating apps felt like a numbers game to Darius. He appreciated the variety of people on Hinge and Bumble, and the convenience of connecting from his phone. Yet, the more he swiped, the more he realised the limitations of algorithm driven dating. Popular apps often focus on quick judgments and swipes, which can make dating “time consuming, emotionally exhausting, and expensive”. For Black professionals like Darius, there were added challenges: he sometimes encountered bias or fetishisation from matches. In fact, a UK survey found one in three online daters experienced racial microaggressions or fetishisation while using apps. Over time, this took a toll on his optimism.
The turning point came after yet another mismatch. Darius craved deeper compatibility and cultural understanding, something an app algorithm struggled to provide. That is when a friend suggested a professional matchmaker who specialises in Black singles. Sceptical but curious, Darius leapt.
Enter the Matchmaker
Working with a matchmaker was a new world. Instead of swiping through hundreds of profiles, Darius had a 30 minute consultation to discuss his values, career, and relationship goals. The matchmaker explained how she would handpick matches from an exclusive pool of vetted Black professionals, focusing on quality introductions over quantity. One client testimonial from a similar service noted that the “focus is on quality matches vs just volume”, emphasising how matchmaking saved her “hours of online swiping” while introducing her to someone who met her criteria.
For Darius, the difference was night and day. His matchmaker, a Black professional herself, understood cultural nuances like the importance of family in Afro-Caribbean communities and shared experiences in the workplace that algorithms often ignore. Each match she presented was aligned not just on paper (education, goals) but in culture and values. He no longer worried about whether a date would “get” his background; compatibility was virtually pre-screened.
From Matches to Soulmates
Within a few months, Darius found himself on a third date with a woman who checked all his boxes and then some. There was no awkward explanation needed about cultural references or career ambitions; they were on the same wavelength. By bypassing the swipe grind, Darius finally felt he was meeting someone he could build a legacy with, rather than just another casual chat.
His journey reflects a broader trend: more singles are realising that “luxury matchmaking services are growing in popularity” as people ditch dating apps for real professionals. While dating apps remain a valuable tool for many, Darius learned that investing in a personal approach can pay dividends in genuine connection.
Call to Action: Ready to transform your own dating journey from swiping to soulmates? Explore our free Relationship Readiness Guide to assess your dating goals and consider whether a curated matchmaking approach or a smarter app strategy could be your next step toward lasting love.
Sources: news.sky.com