Every great relationship starts with two whole individuals coming together. One of the best things you can do as a Black single is to work on you. Think of it as a journey where every step of personal development is preparing you for the relationship you want.
Our UK-based Black matchmaking service encourages clients to embrace this self-growth journey even before we introduce them to potential matches.
Why?
Because when you grow into the best version of yourself, you naturally attract a higher quality individual. Our mantra is: Become the One. Meet the One.
So, what might your personal development journey include? First, it could be educational or career growth. Pursuing that promotion, getting a certification, or learning a new skill. Not only do achievements like these boost your confidence, they also expand your social circles. You might meet other driven black singles along the way.
Second, consider emotional and mental growth. This could mean going to therapy to unpack past hurts or reading books on relationship and communication. Emotional intelligence is super attractive and important in a long-term relationship.
Third, don’t forget personal hobbies and passions. Cultivating interests, from fitness to art to community service makes your life richer and gives future partners a window into who you are. Plus, shared activities can become wonderful bonding points in a relationship.
This journey is not about fixing yourself because you are “broken”.
You are not.
It is about becoming the kind of person you would want to date. Imagine the partner of your dreams: compassionate, healthy, stable, growth oriented. Strive to embody those qualities yourself. It is inspiring and empowering to take control of your growth.
And it means when you do meet someone promising, you will feel more equal and confident, rather than looking to them to fill gaps.
Part of personal development is, as we have said before, knowing what you want. If you have not already, see The Importance of Clarity in Black Dating: Knowing Who and What You Want to make sure your self-development aligns with your relationship goals.
The beauty of working on yourself first is that it leads to fulfilling experiences regardless of your relationship status. You start building a life you are proud of, which is attractive in its own right.
Remember, there is no finish line. Personal development is a lifelong adventure. But each step you take brings you closer to a fulfilling relationship.
And when you feel ready to seek that relationship, you will approach it with confidence and self-assurance. If you are curious where you stand, you might want to book a Relationship Readiness Audit for a personalised check-in on your readiness. Your journey now will pave the way for an amazing relationship when the time comes.
Relationship Readiness Audit