Darren matched with someone who seemed perfect on paper, almost too perfect. Her profile pictures were all professionally done and glamorous, and her bio claimed a dazzling career and world travels. Impressed, Darren messaged her. But as they chatted, a few things felt off: she dodged basic questions, and her stories sometimes contradicted themselves. Meanwhile, Darren had another match, Alice, whose profile was lower key but genuine a couple of nice everyday photos and a bio mentioning her love of baking and her rescue dog. Their conversation was easy and consistent. In the end, “Miss Perfect” ghosted him after a few sketchy requests, and Darren gave Alice a real chance. What started as a slow burn turned into one of the most honest and warm connections he had ever had.
The moral? Trust your gut and watch for signals. In the world of online dating, some profiles are not what they seem in fact, more than half of people admit to lying or exaggerating on their dating profiles. Common red flags include profiles with no last names or personal details, only one photo (or all photos that look like modelling shots), or someone coming on very strong very fast (professing love early, pushing for private contact immediately). On the flip side, there are green lights: profiles that show a bit of real life (hobbies, friends, pets), respectful communication, and consistency between what someone says and does.
Red Flags to Watch Out For:
- Inconsistent or Vague Info: If their stories do not add up or they dodge questions about basic things (like what they do or where they live), be cautious.
- Too Good to Be True: Extreme flattery from the get-go, mentioning they are madly in love before meeting, or any hint of financial requests are major warning signs.
- Disrespect or Pushiness: Any rude behaviour, boundary pushing (like pressuring for explicit photos or immediate meetups at a private place) should have you hitting “block” or “report” without hesitation.
Green Lights to Appreciate:
- Honesty and Openness: They fill out their profile with genuine tidbits, and when chatting, they are willing to share about their day-to-day life and take an interest in yours.
- Respectful Pace: They do not rush you into anything. Communication feels natural and two-sided, without you feeling pressured or ignored.
- Shared Values and Effort: They ask you questions, remember things you have said, and share values or interests that align with yours in a meaningful way.
Call to Action: The next time you are scrolling through profiles or chatting with a new match, practice reading between the lines. Notice how they communicate and whether their words match their actions. Do not ignore those gut feelings if something feels off, and likewise, do not overlook someone whose subtle sincerity might be shining through. Spotting the red flags can save you heartache, and recognising the green lights might lead you to someone truly great.